


Closer and Closer Still

by SuperBlondie



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Also stick with me on Bu Fan/Victoria, Alternate Universe - Historical, Dark, Emotional Manipulation, It just worked in my mind for this fic okay, Junmyeon is a sweet gentle boy, M/M, Minor Character Death, Some Fluff, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-21
Updated: 2019-01-21
Packaged: 2019-10-14 00:32:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17498246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuperBlondie/pseuds/SuperBlondie
Summary: Junmyeon is obedient. He has been from the moment they found him. He does what he is told. He is well-behaved, lovely, sweet. Most importantly, he isYifan's.





	Closer and Closer Still

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all! So this is probably my favorite fic I've ever written and it's definitely one of the darkest. Thank you so much for reading this story and I hope you enjoy it! There is a lot of emotional manipulation and unhealthy relationship stuff in here, so if that sounds like something that might bother you, just know what you're getting into. Thank you, mods, for holding this fest! I had a lot of fun writing this and would love to join in again! 
> 
> As promised, [here is the mini-sequel I did for inktober!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/16163915/chapters/38308193)
> 
> As always, a big thank you to [Aarushi!](https://twitter.com/AarushiC_18) you're the best!!!

The fire crackles and burns, light dancing across Yifan’s skin as he presses another fold in the paper closed. He watches as Junmyeon attempts to follow him, but his fingers are still clumsy, still fumbling where they hold the yellow paper.

"Not like that," Yifan murmurs. He pulls the paper away and shows Junmyeon again, taking his hands in his own to force the muscles to do it correctly. It forces the light to reflect off of Junmyeon's skin in a different way. Yifan says nothing, but he fixates on the shiny scar running along the back of Junmyeon's thumb from his wrist, the only scar that held out against Victoria's numerous lotions. Junmyeon has claimed that the scar doesn't bother him all that much, but he always pulls his sleeve over his hand when he notices Yifan's stare.

Yifan doesn't understand the embarrassment, the shame. He and Victoria found Junmyeon hidden behind a bookcase in the house of an amateur natural philosopher, one known for his obsession with the human body, who made the grave mistake of not repaying a loan to Wu Manor. It would've taken creatures of much less intelligence to not realize where the scars came from. There’s only one scar now, the rest of them have long since faded back into his skin.

Yifan's mother made sure of that. The nearby villages will need a few generations to regrow to their original size, but Victoria refused to let Junmyeon walk around covered in scars she could heal. Junmyeon thinks that Victoria’s lotions work so well because she’s a particularly intelligent about which plants to pick from the garden. He thinks that pink tint to the cream is from the roses he tends to in the spring and summer; Victoria and Yifan are happy to let him continue thinking that way.

Yifan thinks Bu Fan is a bit jealous of Victoria's fondness for Junmyeon, as if Victoria didn't choose Yifan's father to be her own all that time ago. No, Victoria loves Junmyeon as much as she loves Yifan, maybe more so because he lets her fawn over him in a way that Yifan stopped appreciating decades ago. Of course, Junmyeon is also much younger than Yifan, coming up on only his eighteenth year this summer.

"Yifan," Junmyeon gently tugs his hands out of Yifan's grip and brings him back to the present, "I think I should go back to helping decorate for tonight." He motions to where the servants are hurrying around the foyer and dining room with boxes of decorations and dinnerware.

"Servant work, Junmyeon." Yifan had pulled Junmyeon away from a box of red ribbons to work on a new piece of origami, citing that he was not a servant. He knows Bu Fan has made it quite clear to Junmyeon that he is to help around the manor. Yifan ignores that rule. Victoria has adopted him as a ward, just a bit under Yifan's own station, and so that is what he is. "You are not a servant. Try to fold the ear again."

Junmyeon chews on his bottom lip for a moment; two years has made him comfortable enough to move around the manor on his own, but not enough to accept his new role in life. "If you help me with the ribbons, it would be done quickly and we could go back to folding paper."

"We are already folding paper. And I am not a servant either."

"Please," Junmyeon asks. Yifan sighs through his nose. "It would just be that box, Yifan." Two years and Junmyeon has become comfortable enough to bother him shamelessly.

Yifan pushes himself out of his chair and motions for Junmyeon to follow, rolling his eyes at the bright smile. "This box, Junmyeon. _Only_ this box." Junmyeon hurries to catch up to him, shorter legs working overtime to match his strides. He nods furiously. If Yifan didn't know better, he would think Junmyeon looks smug to have Yifan doing his bidding; he knows better, Junmyeon is just excited to have Yifan spending time with him.

The box of ribbons empties quickly. Junmyeon has already devised a system on decorating for the winter solstice. He has only been with them for two, but he learns fast. Yifan defers to him for where the ribbons should be placed. It makes Junmyeon happy to be in charge and Yifan doesn't care enough about the decorations to worry about how it looks at the end.

"You have to look from the top of the stairs to be sure it all looks nice," Junmyeon explains as he pulls him up the staircase. "Sometimes things look right from the ground and then look very wrong from the top floor. Master Victoria taught me the first solstice, when I couldn't help yet."

Yifan remembers that year. The scars on Junmyeon's hands had been too thick for him to have much movement at all; the origami Yifan has him do is just as much to make Junmyeon happy by spending time together as it is to reteach his hands how to move.

"Happy with how it looks?" Junmyeon nods. "Good." Yifan leads him back down the stairs, settling back in their chairs in front of the fire. "Show me the fold again." It's obvious in how Junmyeon's eyes dart back to the servants that he wants to continue working, but he promised one box. "Junmyeon."

Junmyeon nods and turns back to his paper, fingers shaking as they fold again and again. Yifan has long since stopped worrying if the tremors were based on fear; Junmyeon hasn't been afraid of him in over a year.

What else could he expect after he let Junmyeon sleep in his room after nightmares?

The first night Junmyeon spent in the manor, just across the hall from his own room, he woke to the sound of inconsolable crying. Yifan had waited for his mother to come and take care of Junmyeon as her hearing was even better than his own – she _must_ have heard him crying. But she never came and Junmyeon didn't stop crying, so Yifan went to Junmyeon's room and told him to go back to sleep, that he would keep watch and make sure no one climbed through his window and took him. Their rooms are on the top floor, so no one would be climbing in through his window, but the idea of it had plagued him the first few months anyway.

After a full week of being woken up to Junmyeon crying and having to get up and go to his room, Yifan told him to come to his room instead. Yifan's bed was bigger and more comfortable, his windows were heavy and hard to open, it just made sense. Yifan thinks Junmyeon has started coming to his room at night even without any nightmares, heartbeat calm and steady even before he slides under the covers.

Yifan doesn't care. It's not his business why Junmyeon continues to come to him so long as he doesn't have to get out of bed and go comfort him.

What Yifan does care about is that both Victoria and Bu Fan swear that they have never heard Junmyeon cry at night. Yifan knows the limits of his own hearing and of theirs, they should have heard Junmyeon crying from across the house as if he was sitting on their floor, but they swear they have never heard a thing. Victoria admits she's heard Junmyeon shuffle down the hall to Yifan's room, but that she decided that Yifan must have already taken care of any issue.

"I think I did it right," Junmyeon hands him the paper with a hopeful raise of eyebrows. Yifan turns the paper over in his hands before handing it back with a nod. It's not enough for Junmyeon, he knows, but he doesn't hand out praise lightly – or without being asked. If Junmyeon wants a compliment, he can ask for one.

Yifan waits a moment for Junmyeon to ask if he did well. It's rare that he asks for the praise he craves, but Victoria asked Yifan to give him a moment from time to time to see if he's started to grow more comfortable. Junmyeon doesn't ask this time. And so Yifan moves onto the next step, "This is how you make the face. It's fairly easy but I want you to watch closely."

Junmyeon is nearly done with the rabbit when Victoria and Bu Fan come down from their studies for dinner. Yifan keeps Junmyeon in his seat with a hand on his thigh when he begins to scramble to his feet to bow. Victoria's lips quirk up in a small smile that she makes sure Yifan sees before she allows it to spread into her usual smile for Junmyeon.

Dinner, despite the lavish decorations, is no different than any other night. Yifan watches Junmyeon eat and agrees when asked if he likes the food. Victoria and Bu Fan hold conversation and cut their food up, pushing it around their plates and pretending to eat. Junmyeon has never noticed, or never spoken up about, the fact that he is the only one actually eating. Yifan suspects it’s because it could be seen as questioning Bu Fan or Victoria and that is something he would never do.

Yifan is careful to never spend a meal alone with Junmyeon, lest he be forced to actually eat. Junmyeon has no qualms about questioning Yifan.

It isn’t that he _can’t_ eat but that food is tasteless. Victoria is the same, chewing unhappily when Junmyeon asks if she likes the rice. Why would Yifan eat if he didn’t enjoy it? His father still eats from time to time, only on the rare occasion when the kitchen makes something suited to his tastes; the kitchen hadn’t even been used before Junmyeon came to live with them, it only made sense that the meals be things he enjoyed.

“Remember to stay in tonight, dear,” Victoria says as she excuses herself from the table. She and Bu Fan have never stayed longer than half an hour at the table, not since Junmyeon made it apparent that he was more than happy to spend time with Yifan. Junmyeon nods, ever obedient.

Yifan rolls his eyes. Victoria tells him to stay inside as if any of their kind would be careless enough to pick a target without making sure they’re not a protected human. He is well known in their community, the little human pet of Wu Manor. He’s safer than any hunter hiding behind garlic and holy water. Victoria said even Yifan’s cousins Luhan and Sehun look out for Junmyeon when he goes to the city. There’s no reason for Junmyeon to stay in tonight other than to soothe Victoria’s nerves, but it is not Yifan’s place to question his mother.

Yifan watches Victoria and Bu Fan disappear up the stairs to their room, stating that they’re ‘turning in for the night’. Junmyeon continues eating, continues talking. He finishes but makes no move to get up, instead taking care to flatten out his napkin. It’s odd. Humans have always been odd creatures to Yifan, but Junmyeon has always been especially intriguing. It’s likely because he rarely offers explanations for his behavior – a trait he learned from Yifan and his parents, undoubtedly.

Yifan gives him a rare smile when he manages a simple fox out of his napkin. “I’ve been practicing,” he says, “Master Victoria and Master Bu Fan give me their scrap paper and I work on the animals I remember when you’re in your study.”

“Very good. It’s good to practice without me, shows determination and discipline.” Yifan doesn’t mind giving Junmyeon that bit of praise without being asked.

Victoria and Bu Fan appear in the window behind Junmyeon, dressed to hunt. They wave at him before taking off into the night. Yifan pushes down the wave of yearning to join them.

Junmyeon spent the last winter solstice alone, waiting outside Yifan’s study door because they spent every evening together and Yifan had neglected to tell him that that night would be any different.

He hadn't been entirely alone; one of the kitchen boys had attempted to keep him company for most of the night. The next morning, Junmyeon was quiet. He didn't yell – he never yells, never gets angry. Instead, Junmyeon had simply walked past Yifan without a word and disappeared into the kitchen for most of the day.

Yifan doesn't remember exactly how he felt when Junmyeon came out that evening, laughing quietly with the kitchen boy, but he does remember how angry Bu Fan had been at having to clean up his mess a few days later. It was of little importance to Yifan. He had been too preoccupied with helping Junmyeon look for his missing _friend._

As much as Yifan wants to join his parents on the hunt, it's simply better for all of them if he stays home. Junmyeon's attention won't stray and there won't be any messes to clean in the morning.

"Do you have much work to do tonight," Junmyeon asks as he finishes his food. Yifan shakes his head and watches the private smile spread across Junmyeon's lips. It's gratifying to see how attached Junmyeon is, so happy to have Yifan's attention as though they do not spend nearly every second of Yifan's free time together.

Victoria mentioned once, barely a month after his arrival at the manor, that Junmyeon might be lonely. Yifan had watched him wander the halls and deflate when the servants rebuked his attempts at friendly conversation with little more than a bow and an excuse of some other task to be done. Despite what Victoria likes to tease, it had nothing to do with Yifan's sudden appearance at Junmyeon's side.

If left to his own devices, he would start doing servant work; Yifan took it upon himself to keep Junmyeon from sinking that low. He isn't always successful, but Junmyeon would likely be indistinguishable from the hired help if Yifan wasn't there to pull the broom or polishing rag from hands. He is doing his part to keep the members of his family acting as is fitting of their station.

Yifan leads Junmyeon up the stairs to their wing. "My room. See how far you can get through making a rabbit before I catch up." Junmyeon nods and takes off at a run. Yifan laughs under his breath and shakes his head. He will likely never understand Junmyeon's ability to enjoy life like this. It could be a part of being impermanent; Junmyeon makes the best of each day because he has no way of knowing which one is his last.

Yifan pushes the thought away, rebuking himself for the sudden knot of discomfort settling in his stomach.

Yifan follows Junmyeon down the hall and pauses at his study, trying the doorknob. It's locked, as always, but it doesn't hurt to make sure. The servants in the hall freeze at the noise, each pretending not to strain for even the slightest glimpse of the only room in the house they aren't allowed.

"Wandering eyes don't belong in their sockets."

The servants scatter. It helps to ease the strange, uncomfortable tension building in his core. He is powerful, feared. He has nothing to fear, not even death.

"I’m stuck on the ears," Junmyeon explains when Yifan catches up and finds him sitting cross-legged on the bed with a rabbit barely taking form. "Sorry."

Yifan hums. "Let me see them. Not the paper, your hands. And don't apologize," Yifan crouches and takes Junmyeon's hand in his own. His fingers shake from overuse and Yifan thinks it's less that Junmyeon is making mistakes and more that his hands are simply exhausted. It's Yifan's fault, giving him more origami work than usual to keep him occupied until the blizzard stopped. "No more origami tonight. Let your hands rest."

Junmyeon blinks and his brow furrows in that way that tells Yifan he doesn't want to stop. If Junmyeon protests, he'll help him finish the rabbit and then hide the rest of the paper on top of his bookshelf. But Junmyeon doesn't protest. There's a moment when he opens his mouth and Yifan thinks that he might, a strange ball of pride building within him, but then Junmyeon huffs a sigh and puts the half-folded rabbit down.

"Good boy." Yifan isn't sure why he said it. Praise has never been quick to pass his lips, but it felt right at the moment. Junmyeon enjoyed it, at least, that much is clear in the sudden smoothing of his brow and how he attempts to move closer. Yifan doesn't stop him. He used to when Junmyeon was young and simply desperate for attention. Junmyeon would cling to him and Yifan would push him off onto Victoria.

Yifan isn't sure when, _if_ , that ever stopped. He isn't sure when he stopped pushing Junmyeon away either. But he lets Junmyeon settle next to him. They're not close enough to touch, but they're close enough for Yifan to feel the human's body heat, warm blood so close to the surface.

Yifan tries not to think about it. He's been fasting in preparation for tonight and the effects are irritating. He doesn't fear that he might hurt Junmyeon – he'd lock himself in his study with a servant before then. It's still a touch disturbing to be so keenly aware of Junmyeon's heartbeat though, attention focusing on the pulsing blood vessels covering his neck.

"Yifan, are you going with Masters Victoria and Bu Fan this year? To the party?" Junmyeon's voice is an anchor, keeping him in the moment. Yifan shakes his head and moves off the bed to the armoire, putting space between them. He would never hurt Junmyeon, his little shadow – Victoria's precious human. "I'm glad."

Yifan pauses, turns to face Junmyeon. Junmyeon is staring back at him, utterly brazen and comfortable in Yifan's space. Yifan is oddly thankful for it. He appreciates how Junmyeon doesn't curl in on himself like he used to, doesn't shy away from looking Yifan in the eye. "You're glad," Yifan asks. Junmyeon nods. "What for?"

"That you aren't going," Junmyeon replies, smiling with one side of his mouth as if Yifan is silly for even asking, as if it wasn't obvious. "I had hoped you would stay."

"And why is that?"

Junmyeon's cheeks blush pink and he looks away, gaze flitting over the books on Yifan's shelves. He has read them all already, or had Yifan read them to him if they were too old for his hands or written in a language he didn't know. But he stares at the titles as if it's the first time he's ever seen them. "I overheard Masters Victoria and Bu Fan discussing the party. I hadn't meant to! The door to Master Victoria's study was open and I was waiting to be called in and I heard them. It sounded like a party people attend to find marriage partners. I didn't want you to go."

There's something barely hidden in that statement, something fragile and hopeful and Yifan isn't sure what he's supposed to do with it. He isn't even sure _what_ it is, simply that it belongs to Junmyeon, and Yifan had never realized it existed before this moment.

Yifan pulls his bedclothes out of the armoire, tucking the fragile thing away to examine at a later time. "Well, I am not going and will not be going for the foreseeable future." When he turns around again, Junmyeon is staring at him once more. He's smiling openly now, pretty white teeth on display. Yifan finds himself returning it, albeit on a much smaller scale. "Go," he says, "dress for bed. I'll read something to you when you return."

* * *

Yifan knows he should have expected it, letting Junmyeon lie next to him as he read aloud. Junmyeon had asked if he could just rest his head on the pillows at first, then if he could get under the duvet because he was cold. Yifan knew what was happening but allowed it anyway.

"You are _not_ as clever as you think," Yifan tells Junmyeon's sleeping face. "I was well aware of what you were doing." Junmyeon sighs in his sleep and nuzzles his face against the pillow, blissfully unaware of the strange twinge the sight causes in Yifan’s chest. “Or maybe you _are_ that clever, settling yourself in my space until I don’t even think to push you away. Hm? Which is it?”

The answer never comes nor does it matter. He knows Junmyeon doesn't care much for being clever. Junmyeon is not a malicious creature. No matter how clever he is, all he wanted in this moment was to fall asleep here, in Yifan's bed. His goals are small and Yifan appreciates the simplicity. Yifan’s kind are known for the way they work in the shadows, using every power at their disposal to reach lofty, all-consuming goals of domination and control.

Junmyeon desires comfort and companionship, warmth and praise. It’s a welcome change, welcome enough that he doesn’t mind indulging Junmyeon when he wants somewhere soft to rest or another person to walk at his side.

A knock comes at his door as Yifan is finishing coaxing a fire to life to keep Junmyeon warm. It’s less for Junmyeon’s comfort and more to reduce reduce the risk that he wakes up from the cold. Yifan moves his armchair to block the firelight from hitting Junmyeon’s eyes for this reason as well. If Junmyeon wakes, Yifan will have to leave his study and soothe him; it’s just easier to keep him sleeping.

Victoria is waiting outside his door when he finishes adjusting the armchair. She greets him with a smile, eyes flitting to a point over Yifan’s shoulder. “Junmyeon isn’t in his room. Would you happen to know where he is? I’d hate to have a talk with him about going out when I asked him to stay in.” Her voice is light and playful – teasing as she always does.

Yifan finds himself tensing regardless. Junmyeon hasn’t disobeyed a single order, a single suggestion or off-hand comment Yifan or his parents made without thinking. He would never. Likely the _idea_ of being punished for disobeying would be enough to cow him. “You and I both know he hasn’t left the manor, do not joke about upsetting him. He fell asleep in my bed and I plan on letting him stay – unless you would prefer to wake him?”

Victoria’s light up and her grin grows. “No, no,” she says, “let him sleep. I wouldn’t want to disturb his rest. How lucky it is that he has you to look out for him, hm? Helping him stay out of trouble.” Yifan rolls his eyes and steps forward, pulling the door closed behind him.

The walk to his study is quick and quiet. Yifan pulls the key from around his neck, hurried heartbeats loud in his ear even through the door. There are six of them, not including the slower, nearly imperceptible thudding of Bu Fan’s heart. It’s less than any year since Yifan came of age and was allowed to hunt, but still enough to keep them fed for months.

Yifan does truly study in his study. He studies how long he can keep a human alive to feed him. He studies which veins to slice open and which to avoid. He studies how loudly a human can scream.

The study is made of cold, impassive grey stone. The floor tilts in towards the center where a hole for drainage sits, a trick Victoria learned from another of their kind to help with the mess. The drain leads to Victoria’s garden, the patch of flowers she uses for the ointment for Junmyeon’s hands.

Yifan often wonders if Junmyeon would have let Victoria spread the lotion over his scars if he knew where it came from. It wouldn't have stopped her – Victoria would have held him still if he'd tried to resist because scars have always bothered her, but Yifan still wonders.

Heavy metal chains hit the stone with grating metallic clanks as Bu Fan finishes restraining the last human. Yifan's father looks up from his work with a pleased smile and checks that the cuffs around each wrist are tight enough. A few of the humans are awake, only barely, but enough to speak, and they plead with Bu Fan for mercy. Bu Fan lets them for a minute; he pretends to listen and empathize. "Yifan," he calls and the humans startle at the sight of Yifan and Victoria emerging from the shadows, "suspend them, if you don't mind?"

Hunger, that strange thirst that Bu Fan says is nothing like what happens when Junmyeon's stomach rumbles in the mornings, forces Yifan's gums to split open as he walks over to the free ends of the chains. Fangs, long, hollow, and pointed, slide down over the puny teeth humans call fangs. It stings. It always stings, but Yifan has come to love the sting. It means food is close.

Distantly, Yifan recognizes a strange sense of relief that he will be able to return to his room and not have Junmyeon's heartbeat taking up all his focus, attention narrowed to the blood rushing through Junmyeon's veins, but he pushes it away.

The rest of the humans wake as they're suspended by their arms, chains pulling them upright and holding them in the air. "Please, let us go," one pleads, "we didn't do anything. We won't tell anyone."

"Oh, we know you haven't done anything. This isn't personal. If it was, my sweet child would've already killed you. No room for finesse in his head when he's angered." Victoria moves around the room with such a fluidity that she appears to float, examining each human in turn. Bu Fan has already chosen his and he waits, looking utterly bored now that the humans have turned their attempts to plead for mercy to Victoria.

Yifan smiles to himself. He has never truly bonded with his parents except in these moments, when he can watch them relax out of the facades they've forced upon themselves to appear human.

Victoria becomes graceful and fluid as her fangs drop down and the pupils of her eyes narrow and elongate into slits. Bu Fan stands still, impassive and lying in wait for the moment he can strike. The humans have always linked their kind to bats; Yifan has always thought snakes would be a better descriptor.

Junmyeon would be so odd to watch in these moments. He is soft, gentle. He would likely keep his human unconscious until they died to save them from feeling any pain. Yifan imagines him discovering how to store blood so they don't have to kill as often.

He decides to treat his second human from this batch how he believes Junmyeon would, just to see. But there is no goodwill within him for the man daring to meet his eyes now. Yifan hadn't planned to pick him, but he has always enjoyed the rush of power that comes with breaking humans like this man.

"What," he says as Yifan steps forward, fangs fully extended, "you gonna tell me not to scream? That if I'm quiet or I answer your questions that I'll live?"

Yifan laughs as the world dissolves into hot reds and cold blues. Victoria said it was a trait only those who were born into their kind had. Bu Fan's eyes don't change as Yifan's and Victoria's do, no more sensitive to heat than usual.

"Scream as loud as you want. Bu Fan may rip your tongue out if you do because he hates the sound, but there is nothing you can do to get through this alive now." Yifan draws his knife out from the waistband of his pants, testing the sharpness on his own palm. "Does that help? I have heard that knowing the end is coming, that there is nothing you can do to stop it, makes death easier to accept. I don't care, but I wonder if it's true."

Victoria's food lets out a muffled scream as she drags the knife across its arm. There could be servants walking past the study door at this moment, blissfully unaware of the fact that their employers are bleeding their kind dry for fun on the other side of the door.

Bu Fan was smart to build the room out of stone, to hollow the door out and fill it with the cement he witnessed in Rome.

Yifan slices the man's wrist open and relishes in the yell. He leans in and follows the stream of blood with his tongue, careful to keep his fangs clear of the skin. The last thing he wants is to slip and lose a food source because he had to kill him before the venom finishes its job.

Victoria laughs. "Don't play with your food, dear. You never know if Junmyeon will wake and come looking for you."

Yifan nods, puts his mouth to the wound trickling blood, and sucks. The human screams and it's a beautiful song.

* * *

Junmyeon is still asleep when Yifan returns, mostly clean and sated. The fire is dead and Junmyeon tosses in discomfort from the cold. Moonlight casts a silver glow across the bed; Junmyeon looks beautiful – Yifan turns away from the bed and changes into clean clothing. It wouldn't do for Junmyeon to wake up to Yifan covered in blood.

Junmyeon is just beginning to wake when Yifan slips under the blankets beside him. "Shh," Yifan whispers. It’s warm enough underneath the blankets, and he pulls them up from where they'd fallen down to Junmyeon's waist.

The blood from the man still suspended in his study warms him from the inside out and Junmyeon drifts towards Yifan to seek the warmth out, chasing after Yifan's hand where it had brushed his cheek. He lets Junmyeon curl in close to his chest. Junmyeon will fall deeper into sleep if he's warm and then Yifan won't have to spend energy soothing him; it is simply a way to give less effort.

The fragile thing from before attempts to crawl out from where he had kept it locked away. Something tells him that it's important, that he should think about how Junmyeon's breath is warm against his chest. He pushes it away.

Yifan is too awake to even entertain the idea of falling asleep himself, energy of new blood rushing through his veins. And so he spends the rest of the night watching Junmyeon sleep instead.

In one odd moment, Yifan traces the blood vessel in Junmyeon's neck, letting his fingers rest at the pulse. He has a flash of the two nearly imperceptible scars on Bu Fan's neck, left over spiderwebs of Victoria's venom. His fangs slide out – Yifan blinks and pulls his hand back, staring out at the window at the moon until his fangs ascend and he feels more like himself.

* * *

Yifan walks back towards the manor after his run, rolling his shoulders and allowing his joints to pop. It’s rare for him to have that time to himself, when he can actually tire himself out and expend all his pent-up energy. Junmyeon usually tags along and attempts to keep up with Yifan’s already slowed pace; the weather turned cold today though, one last bite of winter before spring, and Junmyeon decided to stay inside.

Yifan enjoys the alone time, enjoyed this run, He found himself missing Junmyeon though. He missed hearing Junmyeon ramble on about the different plants he’s been learning about it in his botany books. Yifan already knows whatever Junmyeon tells him, but it’s cute to hear the hint of pride when the human tells him a relatively obscure fact. Yifan has pretended to not know a few things from time to time.

Yifan plans to pretend he doesn’t know about the flowers he brought with him, a handful of them just beginning to bloom alongside the river bank.

He is just opening the front door to enter the manor when he hears it. “Master Yifan left his study door unlocked.” Yifan rolls his eyes, he never leaves his study door unlocked. He is nearly three centuries old, not a child. He would never forget something so critical. Yifan reaches for the key around his neck on reflex though. And his stomach drops.

He has a distinct memory of the key sitting so innocently in the lock, of Junmyeon calling for him from down the hall and him leaving the key. Junmyeon had been fussing with a bookshelf and it had nearly fallen on him; Yifan hadn’t even thought about the key afterwards, too concerned with Junmyeon’s safety to remember.

Yifan left the key in the study door.

He breaks into a run, uncaring of the servants in his path. The study door is unlocked and both of his parents are away at that damned party. No one is there to guard the door and their secret. Yifan attempts to calm himself with the knowledge that the door is far too heavy for any single human to open on their own. But the door has a tendency to swing open, just a bit, when left unlocked. He doesn’t know how long it’s been since the servants noticed the study door was left unlocked, how long it took word to travel around the manor to those stupid enough to enter where they have been explicitly forbidden to go.

For the servants’ sake, he hopes no one has made the mistake of entering his study, but there’s a heart beating rabbit quick just beyond the door. Yifan feels his gums split open and his fangs drop down. The study door slams back onto the opposite wall and the sound echoes against the stone walls.

Yifan pays no attention to the humans left from the winter solstice or how they jump in terror at the sound. His only concern is the creature standing in the middle of the room, heart beating so loud Yifan can hear it rattling around inside his skull. Humans are always so curious; it always leads them to their death.

He grabs the human by the throat and slams them into a stone wall, relishing the choked scream. Yifan isn’t sure if he should kill them now or drag it out as a punishment for disobedience.

“Yifan,” Junmyeon whimpers, “can’t breathe.”

Yifan snarls in his face, furious at Junmyeon – quiet, loyal, obedient Junmyeon – he has never broken a single rule they’ve given him. He never questioned them about the study either, simply agreed and asked if there were any other rooms he wasn’t allowed to enter. Yifan snarls again because nothing is right about this situation. Junmyeon would _never –_ but he did and now Yifan has to be the one to make sure he faces the consequences.

There are only two ways this can go. Junmyeon joins their kind or dies here and now. Anything else and Yifan risks Junmyeon spreading their secret around, having a mob descend upon their door and disrupt their way of life.

“You idiot! How dare you? After all we have given you, you disobey the one rule that even _I_ gave you?” Junmyeon shakes his head the best he can, hiccupping and attempting to speak through his tears. He pries at Yifan’s hand around his throat and then settles for holding tight and stretching his legs down far enough to rest on his toes and take the weight off his neck. “Hm? Are you so incompetent, so ungrateful, that you decide to disobey at the first opportunity?”

“N-no. I didn’t!”

Yifan laughs dark and vicious. “You didn’t disobey? Then why are you here? In my study? Where you aren’t supposed to be? I should kill you now.”

“I-I didn’t mean to, Yifan, I’m s-sorry! I’m really really sorry. I shouldn’t have – I won’t tell anyone, I promise!”

Yifan knows he should kill him. Junmyeon was a liability before and he’s that much more of a risk now.

But he also knows he can’t. He cannot bring himself to kill Junmyeon. For some reason that is far beyond his grasp, he cannot kill Junmyeon. Yifan lets go of Junmyeon’s throat and watches in resignation as he sinks to the floor, coughing and crying openly. “I’m sorry,” Junmyeon whispers, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to disobey.”

“Did anyone else enter this room with you?” Junmyeon shakes his head, hiccupping out that he was the only one as far he knew and he’d only been in the room for a few minutes before Yifan arrived. The humans chained to the walls attempt to scream for help through the gags and Junmyeon shoves his hands over his ears to block out the noise.

“Get out of my sight. I’ll decide what to do with you later.” Junmyeon pushes himself up from the floor on shaky legs and sprints out of the room.

Yifan shuts the study door and locks it before grabbing the metal bar Bu Fan uses to test how much weight any new chains they buy can hold and snaps it in half. Simmering fury sits high in his chest and all he wants is to rip someone apart. Not Junmyeon though, Yifan’s anger is centered on Junmyeon’s disobedience and yet the urge to physically punish him has already fled.

If he focuses, he can hear Junmyeon crying in his room. Yifan doesn’t understand it, _hates_ it, but he feels an acute sense of disappointment in himself. He would understand if it was the product of his own inattention and forgetfulness regarding the study door, but it’s not. Part of him wonders what Junmyeon felt when he entered Yifan’s study and saw what the Wu family was hiding from the world.

Does he hate them? Does he think them monsters now? Yifan doesn’t think he does. Junmyeon is loyal to a fault. If Yifan called for him now and asked him to watch Yifan tear someone apart to earn forgiveness, he would likely do it. For a moment, he considers it. All he would have to do is make Junmyeon an accomplice and he wouldn’t have to worry about the human telling their secret. Junmyeon would be happy to be forgiven; he would be _overjoyed._ And Yifan enjoys the idea of allowing Junmyeon to see him at his most powerful.

Yifan wonders what is wrong with him. His anger is still there, still clouding his mind and sending an urge to kill rushing through his veins. And yet, he still thinks about Junmyeon, about how happy he would be if Yifan forgave him. Yifan attempts to push Junmyeon from his mind and turns on his heel and walks towards the humans chained to the wall. He allows the simmering rage from first finding Junmyeon in his study to seep into his body, to turn him heartless.

Junmyeon is still crying when Yifan begins breaking every bone in the woman’s body.

* * *

Junmyeon is still crying when he goes to sleep that night. He finally stops near dawn and Yifan blinks at the cold hollow in his chest. If Yifan was keeping count, he would say that Junmyeon cried for nearly twelve straight hours. But Yifan refuses to admit that he was keeping count and so only cares that Junmyeon stops sometime before dawn. It doesn’t mean Yifan can fall asleep though.

Yifan goes through the manor as usual the next day, watching any and every servant for even the hint that they might have entered the study before Junmyeon the day before. None of them show any signs. One girl watches him closely, but he attributes that to the fact that she is a servant who normally tends to Junmyeon.

Yifan catches a glimpse of Junmyeon before dinner. He is wandering the halls, so unused to having time to himself, when he sees the girl knock on Junmyeon’s door. Yifan melts into the shadows as best he can and watches as Junmyeon’s door cracks open.

“Will you be having dinner, Master Junmyeon?” Yifan can only watch through the crack in the door as Junmyeon shakes his head, eyes rimmed red. “You need to eat, sir. You refused your morning and noon meals too.”

Junmyeon sniffles and rubs at his eyes. His smile is hollow and broken, a shaky, fragile thing Yifan sees through in an instant. “I am just...just not hungry today. I’ll eat tomorrow if I’m feeling better.”

The servant girl nods and bows. She shuffles away with a defeated air. Junmyeon sniffles again and goes to close the door. Yifan considers calling for him. He needs to eat and Yifan doesn’t know when Junmyeon will unless he’s ordered too, but Yifan doesn’t. The door closes and the lock flips shut.

Yifan stares at the door for a few moments more before continuing on his wanderings. If he stops by the kitchen and orders for a plate of bread, meat, and cheese to be sent up to Junmyeon’s room with the order that he eat something, it is simply his duty as the current ruler of the manor to keep those inside it alive.

The aching emptiness in his chest has nothing to do with it.

Junmyeon doesn’t cry throughout the night this time. He sleeps for a while and Yifan feels a modicum of relief. He finds sleep as well, for a time. But then Junmyeon wakes up from a nightmare and cries harder than he did that first night he arrived at the manor. Yifan startles awake at the first sob and listens as they only grow louder and harsher, more raw.

Yifan waits for a knock at his door. He wonders if Junmyeon understood that Yifan only meant for him to stay out of his sight until he had calmed. He wonders when he calmed. It’s a simple answer, but one he finds just out of reach. Yifan has never felt regret before. Why would he? But he regrets hurting Junmyeon, he regrets that Junmyeon doesn’t knock on his door and worm his way into Yifan’s bed for comfort. Yifan knows he could just as easily go to Junmyeon and offer the human forgiveness and comfort.

Yifan finds himself more than willing to forgive Junmyeon for his transgressions. Oddly enough, Yifan finds that he has _already_ forgiven him.

But Yifan is a prideful creature. He always has been and always will be. If Junmyeon came to him, Yifan would accept him. Yifan will not go to Junmyeon. Junmyeon was the one who did wrong and Yifan will not be the one to break.

It is unnerving. Anger still sits underneath his skin, a vicious, bloodthirsty thing, but none of it directs itself at Junmyeon. Instead, it rages indiscriminately at the moon for shining too brightly, at the other side of his bed for being empty. He rages at the door for not opening and bringing Junmyeon to him.

So they spend the night on opposite sides of the hallway. Yifan waits in bed for Junmyeon to come and Junmyeon hides in his room because he thinks Yifan won’t have him any longer.

At dawn, a knock comes at Yifan’s door and he blinks awake. Yifan begins to calculate how many more hours he can spend in bed, how many hours he can allow Junmyeon to rest at his side. Then he throws them out because he is the current ruler of the house and if he says Junmyeon is allowed to sleep through the day no one will protest. He pads across the floor, taking long strides to reach the door. “Junmyeon,” he starts, relief pouring through him in waves.

The servant girl is standing in front of his door instead, head bowed. Yifan’s mood turns sour and he debates slamming the door in her face. But he controls himself. Junmyeon likely fell asleep a few hours ago and the sound of Yifan’s door thudding shut would wake him. He is Yifan’s to take care of, even when he’s disobedient.

“What do you want, girl?”

The servant bows deeply and keeps her eyes trained to the floor. “It wasn’t Master Junmyeon’s fault,” she whispers, “Li Jun saw your study door was open and told the other servants he wanted to play a joke on Master Junmyeon. He told Master Junmyeon that you had returned and wanted to see him in your study. When Master Junmyeon protested that you had told him never to enter his study, Li Jun said that you would be _very_ upset if he disobeyed and didn’t come when you called. I tell you this to ask that you not direct your anger at Master Junmyeon; he cares so much for you a-and he isn’t taking care of himself any longer and-”

“Enough.” Yifan sucks in a deep breath through his nose and forces a calm over his body. “You’re sure of this?” The servant girl nods furiously, swearing that she heard Li Jun say it herself but that she was too late to stop Junmyeon from going into the study. “Thank you for your information. Return to your duties and make sure that Junmyeon eats something substantial today. If he refuses to leave his room, tell him I have ordered him to go to the kitchen and eat.”

“Yes, Master Yifan.”

Yifan doesn’t wait for the servant to leave on her own, stepping back into his own room and closing the door in her face. She stumbles back with a quiet yelp, eyes wide and terrified, but seconds later her footsteps hurry towards Junmyeon’s room to do as she was told.

Yifan sits in the armchair in front of the hearth and tries to blink away the rage. This was insubordination to a level he cannot tolerate, but at the same time he also cannot go out and tear the servant’s skin from his bones in front of the rest of the staff. It doesn’t matter how much he wants to, he can’t.

At least he can take refuge in the fact that Junmyeon truly did not mean to disobey. Yifan should have known he wouldn’t. Yifan sighs – he nearly killed Junmyeon over a malicious servant.

He presses his palms into his eyes and groans into the early dawn light. He was rash and impulsive, rightly so because absolutely no human can know what they are. But he never once asked Junmyeon _why_ he had broken such an important rule and that pains him. Why does it pain him? Why does the knowledge that Li Jun took advantage of Junmyeon’s need to obey and be good fill him with a rage so vicious it makes him almost unreasonable?

Junmyeon is Yifan’s constant companion, yes. They have been together in that capacity for two years, yes. Junmyeon had started finding ways to fall asleep in Yifan’s bed every night since the winter solstice, claiming he had less nightmares with Yifan close. And Yifan never minded. Yifan didn’t mind when Junmyeon began to take up more and more of his time. When Junmyeon becomes frustrated with his own hands and how they shake if he overuses them, Yifan doesn’t even entertain the idea of not being the one he cries to. Yifan has never managed to be patient enough to teach anyone origami before Junmyeon. Yifan has never wanted someone close like Junmyeon, has never cared for their well-being, has never considered someone _his._ So why-

“Oh,” Yifan whispers, “ _oh._ ”

* * *

The manor is silent when Victoria and Bu Fan return. Yifan sees the surprise on their faces when they walk through the door and find only Yifan waiting to greet them. Yifan shares the surprise but has it buried down where he can’t feel it. He expected Junmyeon to break and come to him for comfort, for forgiveness, in a few days; Yifan hasn’t seen Junmyeon in nearly two weeks. Two weeks of lying awake at night and hearing Junmyeon sob into the darkness.

Yifan considered shedding his pride three days after the servant girl came to him and he made his decision. He prefers to think of it as a decision rather than a realization. A decision makes him feel as though he has some sort of control over the rampant emotions storming through his chest every night he wakes to Junmyeon’s tears. Yifan nearly shed his pride and went to Junmyeon, but he didn’t.

He knew it would be so much sweeter if he waited.

“Is Junmyeon ill,” Victoria asks and looks around the foyer. “I thought he’d be here with you. He always loves to greet us when we return.” Yifan simply shakes his head. Junmyeon isn’t ill, Yifan has had the servant girl deliver food and report to him if Junmyeon’s health declines. “Then where is he?”

“In his room, I believe. He hasn’t been leaving it as of late.” Junmyeon doesn’t leave his room at all anymore. The only time Yifan hears his door creak open is when the servant girl lets herself in and out of his room. Yifan has passed on subtle messages that Junmyeon needn’t hide in his room all day, he’s not a prisoner, but Junmyeon has stayed within the four walls. “We have things to discuss about him, actually.” Bu Fan and Victoria share a look, one of those strange, indecipherable things between them that Yifan has never been able to understand.

Bu Fan leads the way to Victoria’s study, the only true study left in the house. He attempts to stop at Yifan’s study, hand held out for the key, but Yifan refuses. He has a surprise waiting in his study, a surprise just for Junmyeon. He whispers as much under his breath when Bu Fan asks. Victoria’s eyes light up and then darken and her face grows grim. Bu Fan sighs and shakes his head, shrugging in response to whatever Victoria has communicated. Yifan lets the usual irritation at being left out of the conversation slide away.

It doesn’t matter what they say to each other as long as Yifan gets what he wants today. He has spent the better part of the past two weeks planning this day and he refuses to let his own trivial emotions put even the slightest hitch in his plans.

Yifan finds himself focusing on the minute details of the walls, floors, and decor of the hallway as they walk. It’s all things he learned to ignore when he was young. He tries to remember how he learned to ignore them. He tries to remember what the hardest things to cope with were when he was young and still growing accustomed to his senses. Bu Fan would be a better teacher than Yifan, but it will be _Yifan’s_ responsibility.

Junmyeon has always been Yifan’s responsibility, hasn’t he?

Victoria locks the study door behind her, turning on her heel and watching Yifan with a carefully measured expression. Yifan returns it in kind. Victoria may adore Junmyeon, may love Yifan as her son, but the good of their kind must always come first. She will put it above all else and Yifan has prepared for that more than anything else. He has to be prepared; he can’t lose Junmyeon. Not after the decision he came to that night.

“Junmyeon entered my study two weeks ago.” Yifan watches Victoria’s jaw go slack and can feel the tension in Bu Fan’s shoulders from across the room. “I left the key in the lock by mistake and a servant decided it would be funny to convince Junmyeon I had asked to see him in my study. I was out at the time and returned to find him standing in the middle of the room. He swears no one else entered but him. But he saw the food we were keeping and knows what we are, at least in part.”

“And he’s still alive, I’m presuming?” Victoria rounds her desk and settles in the chair, staring at the desk surface. She looks sadder than he’s ever seen her before and he doesn’t understand why. Still, Yifan tells her that Junmyeon is indeed still alive. It only makes her frown deepen. She pulls her hair out of its bun and lets it fall around her face, running her fingers through the strands. Bu Fan follows after her and rubs at her back.

Yifan blinks in confusion. He had expected outrage, to be blamed for being so careless, to have to stop Bu Fan from rushing out and killing Junmyeon that instant. He hadn’t prepared for this despair. He doesn’t like it. It feels too much like his own despair when he listens to Junmyeon cry at night and realizes his hands are tied by his own stubbornness. “Is there something I’m not aware of?”

Victoria heaves a sigh and it sounds thick with a sadness Yifan doesn’t know how to explain. “Are you expecting me to kill him or your father? Or did you want us to arrange to have him returned to the trafficking ring from before?”

“ _What_ ,” Yifan snaps. Rage burns hot in his veins. “You would give him back to th-the – after what they did to him? Do you not care for him at all?” The murder he had expected, had prepared for. If it was anyone else they were discussing, he would have killed them himself. The trafficking ring is too much; it makes Yifan’s vision go white hot with rage. He can’t imagine harming Junmyeon, much less give him back to the people who left him so injured and broken.

It’s in moments such as these that he forces himself to understand that falling in love with Junmyeon was not a choice, that taking Junmyeon’s heart in return for his own wasn’t a choice either. It simply happened and Yifan realized it after the fact. It doesn’t make the fact that the memory of Junmyeon curled up close next to him on the night of the winter solstice makes the anger bleed out of him any less true.

Victoria’s head snaps up and her eyes are sharp, calculating. Yifan watches Bu Fan smile with all his teeth. “Well, Yifan, you know that there are only two outcomes to a situation like this, three because of Junmyeon’s history and the ring’s ability to make humans disappear. Which outcome were you suggesting?” Victoria swats at Bu Fan but he dodges and rocks on the balls of his feet with a strange, childish glee. “Junmyeon’s still alive, so either you want him dead or you want him _dead._ And I didn’t think you would wait for our permission in either case.”

Yifan tenses. There a few things he hates more than submitting to higher power, few things that make his words stick in his throat like confessing how deeply his love for Junmyeon runs. But he will, he will do both of those things. Yifan is many things, a murderer, a sadist, a cold, unfeeling monster, but he is not a coward.

“I know the council has been more strict regarding creating more of our kind. They nearly killed the pet Yixing created a few months back. I didn’t want Junmyeon under the same threat. I know that it can take time to get that sort of permission, so I wanted to clear the matter with the both of you to make sure Junmyeon would be safe here.”

Yifan lets his hands curl into fists as Victoria laughs, loud and raucous and so uncontrollable she has to hide it behind her hand. “The council has been well aware of Junmyeon. I asked for permission to change him less than a week after he came to the manor. They were simply waiting on you,” she says. Her eyes are soft and her smile is too.

“Me? Why were they waiting for me? He is your ward.”

Victoria laughs again, quieter this time. “Junmyeon has always been yours. You let him sleep on you the first night we found him, don’t you remember? We were in that inn and he wasn’t used to sleeping lying down in a bed and so you let him rest his head on your shoulder.”

Memories flash by him as Victoria recounts those first few weeks with Junmyeon. He’s already seen them perhaps a million times in the past few days as he came to terms with his own feelings, but they haven’t stopped making his stomach twist so pleasantly. Yifan remembers letting Junmyeon sleep on him, and letting the human link their arms together so Junmyeon wouldn’t get lost as they walked through the busier part of town to get to their carriage. He remembers how easy it was to allow Junmyeon to take up all his time.

“I’d hoped things would end like this, you know,” Victoria stands up from her chair and crosses the room to pull Yifan into a rare hug. Yifan lets it happen. “You never showed any interest in any of our kind. You never wanted to settle down.”

Bu Fan speaks from where he’s taken Victoria’s chair, “We were worried you would become an outcast. It’s not right for our kind to be alone the way you liked to be. There were so many beautiful, competent, educated people for you to choose from and yet you would have none of them. And then Junmyeon appears, depending on you for comfort and attention and covered in scars – you attached yourself to him and never let go.”

Yifan doesn’t know what to say. Victoria and Bu Fan had orchestrated this from the beginning. Yifan had been led into this. A part of him wants to rebuke them, rebuke his feelings and tell Bu Fan to go and get rid of Junmyeon to show the world that he cannot be controlled. Yifan silences that part of him and locks it away. It’s wrong.

He thinks he would love Junmyeon regardless.

"Thank you," Yifan swallows his pride and takes joy in the surprise flitting across Victoria's face. He expects some sort of teasing, but she only nods and steps away. They stand in silence for a slow heartbeat and then Yifan dips into a bow. "I am taking this conversation as permission from both you and the council to take whatever action I see fit."

The sunset streams in through the gaps in the shutters, casting shadows across Bu Fan's face. Yifan watches in near apprehension as Bu Fan blinks thoughtfully. Victoria has already given her blessing in the way she had kissed his cheek during their hug, but Bu Fan has always been the least fond of Junmyeon. If there is anyone who would object, it would be him. And then he grins, nodding. Yifan releases a breath he hadn't realized he was holding and turns to the door.

"Tell him to let go," Yifan turns back to see Bu Fan watching him with a rare, almost imperceptible softness in his eyes.

"What?"

"When it burns, tell him to let go. The harder he fights, the more it will burn. He has to let go." Yifan nods, not understanding entirely. He appreciates the advice though. It is much more than he had expected from his father. "I don't hate him, Yifan. I simply didn't want to invest emotions into someone who would die one day."

"And now?"

"Now, I am looking forward to discovering why you and your mother are so fond of him."

Yifan turns back to the door to hide his smile. He feels strange, soft. The world seems softer too. There is nothing hanging over his head, nothing hiding deep within him and threatening to uproot his very existence. It is just the gentle march of time towards the inevitable.

The study door closes behind him with a gentle click and he stares down the hall. He stares past the stairs and his study and his room, to the dark wooden door of Junmyeon's room.

Yifan starts his walk down the hall. He marches.

Junmyeon has always been inevitable.

* * *

Yifan waits outside Junmyeon's door. The moon is shining through the windows, casting silver light across the rugs and the paintings on the wall. Junmyeon's door is hidden in the shadows. Yifan sits across from it, bathed in the moonlight. The clouds pass by and block the light from time to time and he watches the way the light bends around them.

He has been outside Junmyeon's door since the servant girl wished Junmyeon a good night. She walked away and Yifan slipped out into the hallway and took up vigil against the wall.

He had to be ready.

Yifan listened to the sounds of Junmyeon's feet shuffling across the carpet, the rustling of wardrobe doors and drawers opening and closing. It was all much slower than usual. Yifan wondered if that was, in some way, his fault. If Junmyeon was slowed down by sadness, fear, or the loneliness that Yifan feels in his own chest.

Life will return to the way it should be soon. Neither of them will have to be alone anymore. Yifan smiles at the thought and stretches out his legs. He tips his head back to rest against the wall and waits more patiently than he has ever waited in his life. It shouldn't be much longer.

Yifan's eyes snap open at the first tearful sob. Junmyeon sounds worse tonight than any of the nights before. Victoria had mentioned he seemed desperate when she went to see him before he went to bed, but not like this. It makes Yifan's chest ache.

Perhaps he shouldn't have left Junmyeon for so long. It seems to have done more harm than good, even if all he meant was to make their reunion that much sweeter.

He doesn't hesitate to push himself to his feet, taking the two steps across the hall with anticipation forcing a smile across his face. It has been _so long._ Yifan has missed Junmyeon more than he will admit to anyone but the human himself. He is tired of the quiet, empty space beside him; he is tired of hearing Junmyeon suffer and being unable to do anything to stop it.

"Junmyeon," he murmurs as he pushes open the door, forgoing knocking. Junmyeon has never asked him to knock before.

Junmyeon startles and begins rubbing furiously at his eyes. He curls into a ball and tugs the blankets over himself to hide. Yifan hums. Junmyeon has no reason to ever hide, not from him. And Yifan tugs the blankets back down, uncurling Junmyeon's fingers from the fabric as the human cries harder. A sob hitches off into silence when Yifan cards his fingers through Junmyeon's hair.

Junmyeon stares up at him through the tears. "Yi-Yifan?" Yifan hums again and fits his hands under Junmyeon's arms to lift him into his lap. "What..."

"Cry if you need to. I'll be here." Something in Yifan settles back into place when Junmyeon twists his fingers into the fabric of his sleep shirt cautiously. "I'm not upset with you anymore," Yifan says, "I missed you." Junmyeon falls to pieces, crying quietly into Yifan's shirt and gripping the fabric so tightly his knuckles turn white.

Yifan doesn't say a single word. That sort of comfort has never been his expertise. Instead, he rests against the headboard and lets Junmyeon cry against him, dragging light fingers up and down Junmyeon's spine. It feels right to have Junmyeon here.

When the tears finally run out, Junmyeon lies utterly exhausted against Yifan's chest. "I'm sorry," Junmyeon whispers, "I shouldn't have gone into the st-"

"Stop. Don't apologize anymore. It's already been forgiven, you're fine."

"Really?" Yifan nods. Junmyeon smiles and drops his head down to rest, eyes already fluttering shut. "I missed you too." Yifan smiles where Junmyeon can't see.

They rest like that for a time. Yifan listens to Junmyeon's breathing become even and his heart slow. The muscles in his body begin to relax one by one and Yifan runs his fingertips along the curve of Junmyeon's neck and down the slope of his shoulder. Junmyeon shivers and giggles quietly. The sound makes Yifan want to pull him in closer, so he does.

It is only the moonlight and them, quiet and peaceful in their space. Junmyeon's room is cold but he doesn't seem to mind, simply pulling up the blankets and pressing himself as close as Yifan will allow. Yifan will let him as close as he wants to be.

Yifan waits until Junmyeon is just tipping over the border into sleep before he cups a hand around his jaw and tips his head up. "Will you come with me for a moment," he asks. Junmyeon nods blearily, fighting to keep his eyes open even as he's crawling off of Yifan's lap. Socked feet touch the ground and Yifan keeps Junmyeon steady as he sways. So tired, but so willing to do what Yifan asks and be good.

Yifan slips his hand into Junmyeon's and intertwines their fingers. It's sweet how his palm nearly engulfs Junmyeon's own.

Junmyeon smiles down at their hands. He is so obvious with his feelings, his heart out for everyone to see. How had Yifan not seen it before?

They walk down the hall in silence. Junmyeon's footsteps are heavy and shuffling against the rug. Yifan finds himself having to slow his own stride so he doesn't pull Junmyeon along. He also finds he doesn't mind. Junmyeon is sleepy and happy. He rests against Yifan's side and Yifan enjoys having him so close.

Junmyeon stiffens when they stop outside the study. "Yifan, I-I," he stumbles over his words and looks up to Yifan with fear in his eyes. "I know better now. I won't go near it ever again, I promise."

Yifan shushes him, releasing his hand. Junmyeon’s heart beats faster as Yifan reaches into his pocket and it’s so precious. Junmyeon is such a precious little thing. "Do you see this door?" Junmyeon nods solemnly, looking painfully guilty. Yifan smiles despite himself. His hand closes around the thing he’s been carrying around in his pocket for the better part of the day, cold metal against his hand. He pull his hand out and keeps the thing concealed in his fist; Junmyeon frowns and his gaze drops to the floor. Yifan opens his fist. “Open it whenever you like.”

Yifan watches Junmyeon’s head snap up, watches how his mouth drops open just the slightest as he sees the key in Yifan’s hand. It’s identical to the one Yifan keeps around his neck. He had it made the morning after he realized that Junmyeon was his. He has yet to find a string or chord he considers suitable for Junmyeon to wear, but that can always come later; he’s enjoying this small moment of drama.

“I’m allowed to,” Junmyeon mumbles as he stares at the key. “Are you sure?”

Yifan scoffs and tries not to become irritated. Junmyeon is still so fragile, clinging to the sleeve of Yifan’s shirt so sweetly. If reassurance is what he needs, Yifan will provide it as best he can. “I am always sure, Junmyeon. Open the door so you know the key works.” Junmyeon stiffens, makes a minute shake of his head. Yifan repeats the order. Junmyeon fidgets in place but makes no move to obey. “Junmyeon, I asked you to open the door.”

“I’m tired. A-and I trust you. I know you wouldn’t give me the wrong key. I just – can we go back to bed, please?” Junmyeon’s heart beats almost worryingly fast in Yifan’s ears. He moves to take a step back from the door and Yifan keeps him still with a hand on the small of his back. “Yifan, I really want to go to bed.” And his voice is so small.

Reassurance and comfort are not easy, but Yifan takes Junmyeon’s hand from his sleeve and squeezes it gently in his own, pressing the key into his palm. “We will go to bed after you open the door. This isn’t a test, Junmyeon. I simply want you to open the door.”

Yifan wonders if he should feel any sort of guilt for lying. He doesn’t.

Junmyeon moves forward when Yifan’s pushes gently, feet stumbling over each other. Yifan only stares when Junmyeon looks back. His face tense, nervous line accumulating the furrow of his brow. Yifan doesn’t respond; it’s easier to step to the side and keep Junmyeon from leaving instead. He’s said his piece. He doesn’t want to say anything else. Yifan watches as he fiddles with key, turning it over his hands and staring down at thing in helpless anxiety. Yifan doesn’t worry. Junmyeon will give in; he will _obey_.

“We can go to bed after? Do you promise?” Yifan smiles, not an answer, but Junmyeon takes it as one. He smiles in return. It’s small and nervous, but he smiles as though Yifan actually promised they’d leave after he opened the door.

As if Junmyeon will leave this room the same person he went in.

Junmyeon puts the key in the lock and Yifan hears the tumblers turn. The lock slides open and the weight of the door pulls it backwards on its hinges until it looks much like what Yifan imagines the door looked like when Junmyeon entered the study before. Junmyeon jumps slightly at the creak of the worn hinges and Yifan laughs inwardly. So precious.

“Do you want me to lock it,” Junmyeon asks. He turns to look Yifan with hope in his eyes. Yifan lets his gaze wander over Junmyeon’s tense shoulders, up the curve of his neck. If he concentrates he can almost see the artery pulsing under the thin skin. “Yifan?”

Yifan steps forward, trapping Junmyeon between his body and the door. Junmyeon backs up a few tiny steps, desperate for space but too afraid to push Yifan away and demand it. Yifan smiles again and his gums burn as the very tips of his fangs begin to slice through. Junmyeon’s eyes dart up to Yifan’s mouth and drop back down. He pretends he hasn’t seen anything but Yifan can hear the sudden uptick in his heart beat. Yifan takes another step forward. “Once you open a door, you have to go through it.”

Junmyeon’s face crumples and for a few tense seconds Yifan thinks he might cry. He raises a hand and pets through the human’s hair, taking a sick sense of joy from the way Junmyeon still doesn’t flinch away from his touch.

He hasn’t done anything to earn this sweet trust, likely doesn’t deserve it. He doesn’t care.

“Do you think I would hurt you, Junmyeon?” Junmyeon shakes his head and Yifan blinks at the soft strands of hair brushing against his palm. “Good. I wouldn’t.” A lie, in a sense. Yifan wouldn’t hurt him without a good reason, but Junmyeon will learn what pain truly means soon. Bu Fan says humans aren’t meant to remember pain though; Junmyeon only has to live through it, not with it.

“I just don’t want to go in. I…I remember what’s in there.” Yifan has never considered what exactly Junmyeon might have seen in the study. The chains and the humans left from the solstice, but Yifan isn’t sure if he saw the blood stains around the drain that they hadn’t bothered to clean. If he saw the healed over puncture wounds on Bu Fan’s food.

Yifan dismisses the thought. Junmyeon will have to learn to cope with those sights on a regular basis. The newly created of Yifan’s kind tend to need to feed more until their bodies have fully adjusted to the new form of sustenance. They simply can’t draw as much nutrition from blood in that first year.

“Nothing in that room will harm you.”

“I know, but the people…”

“Are gone. They were...unruly after seeing you. And I didn’t have the patience to deal with them. So I disposed of them.” Junmyeon pales and Yifan shrugs. They were food; it was only a matter of time before they died. Yifan likens it to human eating cows and chickens. Some humans defend it in saying it is the way of the world for the stronger to eat the weaker – Yifan agrees and he is much, much stronger than any human.

Yifan reaches over Junmyeon’s shoulder and pushes the door open even more. The study is always cold, stone walls and floor doing little to retain any heat, and the cool air seeps out into the hallway. Junmyeon shivers. But his shoulders hunch inward before relaxing in submission and he steps forward over the threshold. Yifan matches each miniscule step forward and crowds Junmyeon in further; it leaves Junmyeon unable to do anything but move forward, to do what Yifan asked and obey.

The moment Yifan crosses the threshold, he pushes the door closed and locks it. The sound of the lock clicking over echoes off the walls. The study is plunged into darkness.

“Yifan,” Junmyeon’s voice trembles. Yifan hums noncommittally and lets his eyes adjust to the dark. Junmyeon is utterly blind. Yifan enjoys how he clings to him the moment Yifan steps close enough for Junmyeon to find. “I can’t see. I want to leave, please.”

“In a moment.” Yifan picks up the lantern he had left earlier that evening and sets it alight. Junmyeon squints at the sudden light and blinks at the stone walls. Yifan places the lantern back onto the floor and waits.

It will only be a matter of time before he sees the gift Yifan has been keeping for him. It had taken work to silence the gift permanently, but a lying tongue is a tongue that doesn’t belong in its mouth. Yifan wonders if Junmyeon will appreciate the gift. Likely not now, but he will someday. He simply has to grow accustomed to the way things are.

Junmyeon gasps when he sees the servant chained to the wall. The man is emaciated and nearly too weak to lift his own head, but he manages it and screams with shredded vocal chords when he sees Junmyeon. Yifan can only imagine what he must be trying to say.

He was intolerably rude the first few days before Yifan quieted him. An impolite liar, a truly despicable person.

“Do you like your gift?” Junmyeon spins on his heel and the confusion on his face is almost laughably obvious. “I thought you would enjoy it. He was the reason you disobeyed, correct? He _lied_ to you. Isn’t that disgusting? A punishable offense.” Yifan takes Junmyeon by the shoulders and gently turns him to stare at the servant that had caused this mess in the first place. He pulls Junmyeon close until his chest is pressed flush against Junmyeon’s back. “I could have very easily killed you that day, you know? And it would have been his fault for lying to you.”

“Y-you would never hurt me,” Junmyeon whispers, “you said you wouldn’t.” Yifan leans down and presses his face into Junmyeon’s hair. He smiles to himself and drops a hand down to Junmyeon’s waist to hold him in place. “Right, Yifan? You – you won’t?”

“Never, Junmyeon. Not unless absolutely necessary.”

“Are you going to hurt him?”

“No,” Yifan watches the shadows of the lantern’s flames dance against the wall, “You will.” His fangs drop as he leans down further and presses his lips to the side of Junmyeon’s neck. For a moment, he wonders if he should kiss Junmyeon first. Junmyeon has always been a fan of romance novels and Victoria mentioned that Junmyeon would be very happy if Yifan indulged him with that sort of physical affection.

Something in him tells him to wait. The idea of kissing Junmyeon now, moments before he hurts him, seems perverse. Kissing would be cruel, would it not? Yifan understands that this entire night has been cruel, using Junmyeon’s desperate need for his attention and approval to string him along and coerce him into this position. But it was necessary.

Instead he murmurs into Junmyeon’s skin, “I love you.” Junmyeon’s heart skips a beat.

“You do?” Yifan nods and he can hear the smile in Junmyeon’s voice even as it wavers in fear. “I love you too.” His heart beats wildly in exhilaration or fear. It’s precious.

Yifan smiles against his skin. He takes the hand not holding tight to Junmyeon’s waist and smooths it down his arm until he can intertwine their fingers together. “I know. You have loved me for a long time, haven’t you?” Junmyeon nods. “I can’t be certain of how long I’ve loved you, but I am certain that I _do_. And it is why I have to do this. You know too much, Junmyeon, you know much too much. But I can’t let you go.” Yifan opens his mouth and lightly presses his fangs to the artery frantically pulsing under Junmyeon’s skin.

Junmyeon begins to squirm in Yifan’s grip, making little noises of fear. “Yifan, don’t! Please, please don’t! I’m sorry, I won’t tell anyone what I know.” Yifan attempts to shush him and holds him tighter. “Yifan, _please._ ”

“I’m not going to kill you. I promise you that. There’s nothing to worry about it. I’ll be right here when you wake and I made sure to have food ready for you to eat. I love you, Junmyeon, is it so wrong of me to want to keep you?”

He looks over Junmyeon’s shoulder and feels a tendril of thrill curl low in his belly as the servant’s eyes widen, as he realizes that the death Yifan has been promising for so long is coming at the hands of an uncontrollable, hunger-driven creature. Yifan’s kind are wild when they’re newly turned. Yifan looks forward to seeing what Junmyeon is like when he’s not quite so bogged down with fear and the need to be good.

Yifan squeezes Junmyeon’s hand in his own. “I’ll be right here. My father said that it will hurt less if you let go.” Junmyeon shakes helplessly in Yifan’s arms and Yifan presses a gentle kiss to his skin. “I’ve got you, Junmyeon. It’ll be over soon.”

Fangs pierce skin and slide deep. The release of the venom comes naturally, flowing through the hollow spaces in Yifan’s teeth and burning through Junmyeon’s veins. Junmyeon starts to scream and Yifan thinks it’s a horrible, wonderful sound.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! If you liked it, please leave a kudos and a comment! Feel free to come talk to me on [Twitter,](https://twitter.com/killmeDO) [Tumblr,](http://killmedo.tumblr.com/) or [Curious Cat!](https://curiouscat.me/killmeDO)


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